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13 Leadership

I made a list of 100 things I should do that scare me. In 2020, I plan to complete all 100.


A few months ago, Caleb (my husband) and I started attending a new Bible study group. My writing mentor and his wife host it. People bring food, and we all eat, talk, study, and pray together.


It’s been incredible. We’ve found a place that feels so much like home, a group of people who takes care of each other and treats each other like family. They even had us stop knocking on the door on the nights we meet; we just come in.


(The group also has an outright disproportionate number of physicists and chemists, and other types of nerds, so Caleb and I fit in more easily than I’ve felt like I fit anywhere in a long time.)


Every week, a different person leads the discussion, and also prays over the meal, decides when the study will begin, and finishes out the prayer requests. Leading a group discussion like that is not usually something I’m nervous to do, but I’m the youngest adult in the group (though not technically the youngest person to lead—there’s a teenager who does it sometimes).


I ranked this as level 2, and I’ll leave it at that, but it was actually a bit scarier than I thought it would be. I felt like I didn’t do a great job; the ice breaker game took a long time, the discussion got off topic and I had a hard time reigning it in, my pacing was bad for when to move on in the reading, I lost track of time near the end.


It wasn’t terrible, though, and everyone was really nice and thanked me for leading. It forced me to study in advance and really think about what questions I’d ask, even though I didn’t end up using most of my notes. I’d be willing to do it again.

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