19 Tea

I made a list of 100 things I should do that scare me. In 2020, I plan to complete all 100.

This one feels so trivial in comparison with the last one.

This is a low level fear, I’m calling it level 2, because I don’t even hate tea. I just don’t really like it. But people keep telling me I should try different types, because they all taste different. I think the idea is that maybe there’s been something about the teas I’ve tried that I haven’t liked, that not all teas have in common.

What DO all teas have in common? I decided to give it a shot . . .

Chai—According to my husband (Caleb), we didn’t get a very good chai, so I’m not sure this is a fair test. It wasn’t heavily spiced and mostly tasted like hot water with a little bit of that tea-flavored bitterness. Not very good.

Peppermint—The peppermint scent was nice, but frankly it really just tasted like tea to me with a little bit of peppermint.

Chai Latte—I’m pretty sure this wasn’t actually tea. It was kind of nice, a little weird. Like hot chocolate, but spice instead of chocolate. I could take a few sips or drink it to be polite, but I wouldn’t voluntarily drink a whole mug. A friend I was with at the time said it grows on you. So maybe if Caleb keeps getting these, I’ll keep trying his.

Starbucks Refresher (strawberry acai)—This stuff is amazing! It has a green tea base, which is why I’m counting it, even though it probably shouldn’t count. It also doesn’t taste at ALL like tea. I don’t think it is tea. It is juice. I love juice!

Starbucks Refresher (mango dragonfruit)—Not as good as the strawberry acai. I drank about half, then gave it to Caleb. Again, though, this is juice, not tea.

Earl grey—I mean, I guess it doesn’t taste like tea, so it’s got that going for it. It’s just bitter hot water. I don’t quite understand the point.

Wild berry—We got a fruit sampler, and this was the one I tried of those. It was okay with sweetener. I felt like it would be better cold, so I put it over ice, and it was a little better. I could have drank the whole mug if I had to to be polite, but I didn’t really want to.

English breakfast tea—This was the most tea-tasting tea I’ve ever tried. Despite sugar, there was no sweetness at all. Least favorite so far, though earl grey was a close second.

Watermelon iced tea—Iced tea is okay, I wouldn’t choose it voluntarily but I don’t make a face when I drink it. This just tasted like iced tea with some watermelon in it. It was okay. I didn’t want more than one sip.

Chocolate tea—This just tasted like tea that was made in a factory next door to a chocolate factory, so someone was like, “Hey, this kind of reminds me of chocolate, we should call it chocolate tea.” LIES.

Alas! I have figured out what the actual teas have in common. They are all tea. I don’t like tea.

Case closed?