4 Dentistry (part 2)
Updated: Jan 16
I made a list of 100 things I should do that scare me. In 2020, I plan to complete all 100.
The week leading up to the appointment wasn’t so bad this time.
I was actually able to sleep the last few nights, and I’ve only had 2 nightmares. I could even eat a little this morning, though admittedly not without feeling quite nauseous afterwards.
This, of course, is the part that scares me the most: the hours leading up to the appointment. Usually it’s a lot worse than the actual pain. Then again, after my last appointment, it’s hard to think about anything except the pain.
Ironically, there was very little pain. There was enough discomfort that I probably would have taken pain over it if there had been a choice, but on the whole it wasn't a terrible or traumatic experience, and the people were really friendly and nice.
I have to go back in for a couple of fillings in two weeks, though, so on the whole I just left feeling miserable, and I still am.
The weird thing is that none of this really flared up my anxiety symptoms: it flared up my depression instead. I felt no panic; I just felt sad and resigned. With anxiety, it was pretty typical I’d be feeling euphoria after the appointment ended, or at least some amount of relief, a feeling of accomplishment that I'd gotten through. There was none of that today.
So not exactly a victorious post this time. Hopefully the next one will be.
(On the plus side, I'm 2 weeks into this challenge, right on schedule with my rate of fear-facing, and I haven't died!)